The "Invisible" Slap

Bheema(Vishal Vyas) had his own style of dealing with girls. He really seemed desperate to forward his resume to all the School of Management students who came under the “Girls” category. He would make his sales pitch in full earnest to all these potential recruiters irrespective of the fact whether the Girls Inc. had a vacancy or not. For him “Top of the mind recall” was a term which he took to heart and tried his best to use marketing strategies for the same. He had a clearly defined segment which he would target with all his strategies. Girls-Age 20+ was Bheema’s Target Group, probably because that’s the youngest you could find in a post graduation course.

Bheema was a mechanical engineer. Being a mechanical engineer had given him intellectual satisfaction but had robbed him of the divine presence of girls for 4 precious years. All those years had been dedicated to the Boyle’s and Machines of the world leaving Bheema with no time to run after girls. I have always seen Mechies show that streak of desperation in all interactions with the fairer sex. They are not to be blamed. When you have spent 4 years in isolation and are suddenly put in a place where you see a lot of pretty faces, you are bound to show “the” signs. Signs of excitement and amazement.

Bheema probably had seen potential competitors early. He had spent too many years in solitude to let go another 2 years which promised a lot. Mithun(Sid) had faced his heat the first day itself. Mithun was accused by Bheema of spending too much time with Shruti, whom he claimed was his friend. I had gone to their room to resolve the issue. But from what I heard that day convinced me that it did not necessarily mean that only mechies resort to desperate measures for impressing a girl. All males do. And Mithun had just been caught in the act.

I had confronted Bheema in his room, “Stop being so childish yaar!! What the hell….you pursuing a bloody post graduation course and still are acting so immature. This is heights yaar. Your accusation is baseless. Cut the crap and patch up!”.

Bheema reverted, “Listen Balu, I know this girl from Pagalguy for the last 1 month. She has become a very very good friend of mine. And this pervert Mithun is trying to get too close to her for my comfort!”

I was shocked, “How on earth can you call Mithun a pervert after knowing him for only 24 hours yaar? And what crap…very very good friend in 1 month!! Till date has anyone from male category made it into that elite category in 1 month flat?”

Bheema was quick with his explanation, “No yaar. She is really a good friend. And you wont say like this once you listen to what desperate measures this good for nothing Mithun is taking.”

And then Bheema narrated me the incident which should be a case in study for all those who try to be heroes before girls.

Bheema had been searching for Shruti in the lunch break, only to find her engrossed in a conversation with Mithun at the dhaba. Bheema, sensing competition and out of sheer curiosity, quickly headed to the dhaba and joined them. Mithun however was not deterred by Bheema’s presence. He continued with his conversation. “You an engineer, right Shruti? Which branch and which college?” Shruti had got a little conscious in Bheema’s presence. Still she carried on, “IGIT…Indira Gandhi Institute of Technology…from Delhi itself…it’s at Kashmere Gate yaar. I have done my B.E. in computers”

Mithun saw this as an opportunity. He replied back in a casual tone, “Ohhhhh…You from IGIT?? Don’t tell me yaar…Wow!! My brother is doing it from the same college. 1st year…computers!! Good college I tell you. He was hell bent on coming to Delhi and doing it from this very college. And we traditionally have done our studies from good institutes only. Its become a family tradition of sorts yaar. And my brother has added one new rising college to that illustrious list. I will come along with you when you plan to go to IGIT. You can give some valuable tips to my brother yaar. ” Shruti threw a shocked look at Mithun. She then smiled a little and said the line which would have been the equivalent of a thousand slaps on Mithun’s face, “IGIT is an all girls college. No wonder your brother was hell bent on joining it. And how on earth did your family manage the change of gender on the medical certificate yaar. Pretty influential family I must say…I am impressed.”

Bheema was looking at me after narrating this incident, waiting for my comments. I burst out laughing. I kept laughing the whole night!