Wednesday, July 9, 2008

GOD USED TO BE A MALLU!!

Jan 3, 2007

I was lazing around in bed. I glanced at my watch. It was only 9am. Too early for me to get out of this slumber. That too on a cold winter morning! No way. Delhi winters for a second year B-School student post the placement week are meant to catch up on the lost sleep. Sunlight was peeping through the torn sheets of newspaper which I had pasted on the windows as a substitute to curtains. I had been trained to think like a manager in the last year and a half. What should I ideally be doing to solve this crisis? Whether I should go for a long term fix or a short term patch up? What will be the ROI in both these cases? Which one will be more feasible? Damn, I cursed the sun and pulled up the blanket over my face. That confirmed I had transformed into a manager! I don’t remember when I slipped back into the divine state of sleep. When I got back to senses, it was 12 in the afternoon. I had a lecture to catch at 12:30. Rather than heading straight to the bathroom in a state of urgency which would have been the case one year ago, I rummaged through my bag to look for my diary. I flipped the pages till I arrived at the one wherein I had made a note of the classes I had missed. My eyes were searching for “IED(Innovation and entrepreneurship development)” which was scheduled at 12:30. I rebuked myself, “Gosh! I have committed a cardinal sin. How could I do this?? The professor has missed me just once till date. How can I take all his attention when other mortals need an equal share? I would miss today’s lecture for you, my friends. Just for you”. After saying these comforting words to myself, I slumped back into my bed.

It was 4 when I woke up for the 3rd time in the day. I put on my favorite jeans dismissing its frantic pleas to get itself a wash. I had been trained to behave like a manager wherein my topmost priority should be getting the maximum mileage from my team. And at 3 months without a wash, this jeans of mine was nowhere close to getting an appraisal. I walked down to Panditji’s Dhaba and ordered a parantha and a cold drink to wash it down my foodpipe. It didn’t matter whether i was broke or without any credit cards to boast off. It only mattered that I had an “Account” at Panditji which would take care of my 2 years at the School of Management. Come what may, I would never die of hunger here. But unlike credit cards, your credit limit goes on decreasing with passing time here. I could not order one of the expensive dishes on the menu because my account had grown from a small baby to a monster, and like other carnivores, the mother “Panditji” had stopped taking care of its babies. They had been on their own. The next moment Mithun arrived and ordered a plate of Chilli Chicken. The very mention of the dish reminded me that it had been long time that I had not caught up with Mithun. I sat besides him and started discussing the surging economy and the exciting sectors to watch out for in the next decade. This discussion then moved towards india’s political scenario and social issues, with Chilli chicken serving the perfect add on. My points started drying up as soon as the last piece went down my food pipe. Mithun paid for the dish and we bade goodbyes. I came back to my hostel room and headed straight for the bed. It was 6 and there was still time for the 9.30 pm movie that we had planned to catch up on. I slumped back into my bed. Life was so under control. I was so carefree. I felt so light. I could feel my wings. I felt I was nothing less than a God. GOD WAS A MALLU THEN!!

Jan 3, 2008

I was lazing around in bed. I glanced at my watch. It was only 9am. Shit!! 9 am……I cursed myself. I had a meeting with the marketing HOD’s at 9.30 sharp. How on earth could I have missed the alarm I set at 8. I checked my diary. I had attended the last two meetings. I was required to present my verticals plans for the upcoming event next month. If I would slump down in my bed this moment, I will be a roasted chicken by tomorrow. I rushed as if the world were to end just to make it in time. I was panting even after gulping a glass of water and settling down. I got free from the meeting at 2 pm. I was damn hungry. Canteen was swarming with employees. I filled my plate and took a seat besides Amit. We discussed the surging economy and the exciting sectors to watch out for in the next decade. The discussion moved towards india’s political scenario and social issues and then towards the dipping sensex. There was no Mithun nor his plate of Chilli Chicken to serve as an add on. Neither was there any need for me to grab anything from Amit’s plate because of the abundance. I reached my cubicle after the lunch only to find a letter placed near my desktop. It was from my credit card company mentioning that they were offering me a platinum card instead of the gold one I used at present with a higher credit limit. I pushed the letter aside and got back to work. The next time I glanced at my watch, it was 7 in the night. I packed up for the day and headed for home. I cancelled the movie plan I had with my colleagues at 9.30 pm because i was too tired to make it. I had a simple dinner at my flat and retired to bed. I did set my alarm at 8 am before dozing off. There was a conference call scheduled the next day at 9.30 am. I feel like a mortal nowadays. GOD USED TO BE A MALLU!!

57 comments:

poonam said...

how similar!,,,
nice post..

priyanka said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
El Furibundo said...

Aye Checkan! Don't we all know the feeling?
God to Mortal. Another way to look at it is:
Human to clone.

You write very well, my friend. Will definitely become a regular visitor!

Sandeep Balan said...

@poonam

yup...eerily similar...everyone's life out there...thanx..

Sandeep Balan said...

@priyanka

2nd this time...had a tough time giving a title to this post...and it suddenly striked...the last two lines in both the para's were added post the title selection. And hey...was sceptical about the new look...but ur appreciation has left no room for doubts...cheers!!

Sandeep Balan said...

@el furibundo

hey..quite a unique name chosen..good one...human to clone is very well put yaar...it will be great to have you back again n again..thanx...

Sudar said...

hehe....well written !! makes me wanna visit this blog more often !

Ruchi said...

Absolutely share this feeling....

Sandeep Balan said...

@sudar

plz do bro...thanx for the comments..

Sandeep Balan said...

@ruchi

great to know that...cheers!

Aravind said...

You are developing this into a good blog dude. Nice work. And I guess marketing strategies too to popularize it.

I'm one of the 8 subscribers shwon in feeburner. New theme looks good too.

Sandeep Balan said...

@aravind

hey..thanx for tht bit...feels great to know that u have seen this blog develop from its infancy stage...its still a 1 n a half month baby...

Aravind said...

Then I think there's some mistake with your subscription list. Feedburner isn't that accurate. I have all the 14 posts by you in my Google reader inbox. I didn't subscribe by entering my email-id. I subscribed via rss to Google reader. If you still don't believe just tell me. I'll send you a screenshot of my inbox :-)
Cheers!!

Sandeep Balan said...

@aravind..

he he he..no boss...i trust u completely...was just thinking that maybe some error on my part which i shud let u know...keep reading man...ha ha ha..screen shot of ur inbox was the funniest part...he he..cheers!

andback said...

HAHAHA dude that was a great read!

"The very mention of the dish reminded me that it had been long time that I had not caught up with Mithun."

Ofcourse it was a long time, nothing like catching up with old times, with empty pockets, over free chicken :D

Matangi Mawley said...

gr8 one! :D
i liked the way u d compared.. u life!

keep posting..

Sandeep Balan said...

@and back

"nothing like catching up with old times, with empty pockets, over free chicken :D"...he he...i agree completely bro...empty pockets was the most common thing...keep coming bak..

Sandeep Balan said...

@matangi

hey..u back after a long time..its nice to see ur comments coz i like ur blog a lot...cheers! thanx for the appreciation..

aby said...

well m planing to do mba..nice peep into the life during and after mba...u remind me of a book...snapshots from hell!! well it almost made me reconsider my decision to go for mba but u have made it more robust, for the life during mba seems not too bad as it is being often said!...perhaps that was ur second semester ,..thats why? ;)

Sandeep Balan said...

@aby

he he...life in a b school is no doubt full of pressure...but then, u love it...its all about peer to peer learning there and you develop some close bonds for life...hope my posts motivate you to take the plunge...cheers!! keep coming back...

Sandeep Balan said...

@aby

hey..the before phase is my final trimester...post placements/Day 0 horrors n all...thats the reason for the relaxed existence..in the 2nd trimester you are slogging like a donkey man....rest everything is the same as snapshots from hell...u have to slug it out bro...he he!

Spacegirl said...

hehe... gr8 job bro! god is indeed mallu! hehe.
love ur applications of management concepts to everyday life... after all, wat is education widout application, elle?

Gagan said...

very nice !!!

Aravind said...

Just downloaded screen-capture software. So wanted to do something with it. :P

Sandeep Balan said...

@spacegirl

adhe..education is nothing without application..he he...thanx for the comments...

Sandeep Balan said...

@gagan

thanx yaar..

@aravind

he he he...gud one...

Shiva said...

nice post...
but whats a mallu?
comment back @
CrAzYbLoG
v.CoL

Sandeep Balan said...

@shiva

a mallu is a malayalee...keralite..

Tarun said...

ha ha ha ha ..!

•sowmya• said...

when i started reading... i tdontnot get the relation between the post and the titlle.. but cud related while reading jan 3 2008..!

gr8 comparision of the similar days..! well written..!



now wts in for u on jan 3 2009...?

Hashan Hazarika said...

Same here man...If someone sets a hidden camera on me these days,what he would end up having is a documentory on "a man's struggle for roti-kapda and makan".The film would be much boring than the art films we used to watch in DD1 when we were in primary schools.Apart from one or two STD calls(say for 45 mins),there is not a single minute in the remaining 1395 minutes that would appeal the audience.

hahaha..keep posting!!

pushkalAn&' pattabhiraman said...

lolz dude! when i started reading this blog i was like not another Mallu Sardar teaser plz... but its was pleasently fresh! good one dude!

Sandeep Balan said...

@soumya

thank god you got the relation..he he...jan 3, 2009 should me more dull...hope this blog sparks it up a lil..he he...keep coming...cheers!

Sandeep Balan said...

@hashan

ha ha ha...that description of the 1395 mins and comparison with documentaries on DD1 were awesome bro...i can very well understand ur frustration...keep slogging...money honey!

Sandeep Balan said...

@pushkala

ooops...thank god u decided to read thru this and not dismiss it as an out of the mill sardar mallu joke...thanx for commenting...

Chintan Patel said...

your post is very detailed but also very long....

Sandeep Balan said...

@chintan

will keep that in mind...but you cant help being long when dealing with incidents etc...the essence is lost...

Farzi Bhushan said...

Boss, its awesome... I loved it.

Dan* said...

i hate long post ..........well it doesnt matter if i like in the end :D

Sandeep Balan said...

@bhushan

thanx bro...

@dan

ha ha..thanx for going thru the pain of readin one...

alex paul k said...

hey started reain n sum guests came....dats y commentin late

hey good one once again n a pleasin variety as well

Sandeep Balan said...

@alex

thnx a ton..

Puneet said...

hahaha.. nice one Sandeep! Could so easily associate with it :P

akshika said...

such is life my fren..such is life... oh how much i wish i cud turn back time...
but must give it to you to hav drwan such an amazin analogy which proves to be such a delightful; read.
ur blog always gets a smile on my lips man...keep up the gd stuff... :)

akshika said...

oh n btw..nice new look... :)

Sandeep Balan said...

@puneet

thanx man...

@akshika

thanx a ton...i consider my effort worthwile for putting back a smile on ur lips...

Mihir said...

GOD!!!
Mithun is such a freak!
heh!
blogrolled you!
cheerios!

Sandeep Balan said...

@mihir

hey..great man! thanx!

.a. said...

i HAVE ingrained in me the habbit of jotting down random lines in my diary abour event that occur daily and sometimes, i turn back pages to see what i was feeling/having last year on the same date! and strikingly they're similar the moods and all, life goes on :)

You're a manager afterall.. I enjoyed the post, very much!

by the way I didnt know what is Mallu, just scrolled down and figured out, hilarious! and amazing.
I enjoyed the thinking and behaving manager bit in the post, remarkable :)

Sandeep Balan said...

@alaena

great habit to inculcate yaar...it really feels good to look back into time and get nostalgic about the same. I am feeling the pinch of not maintaining one as i dig deep to form an analogy...u wont have such a problem...and thanx a lot for the appreciation yaar...looking to see ur comments in future posts...keep coming back...and great that u figured out what a mallu is.....a mallu is a slang used for malayalees..keralites...

anusha said...

oh man! this was one of teh best posts i ve read afte a loong time!! funny, n i guess i wudhv to be prepared for this in some yrs !! great! cheers!!

Comfortably Numb said...

This my friend is the difference between NOW and THEN :P

Cheers...and congratulations for a nice post :)

Sandeep Balan said...

@anusha

hey...am truly honoured to read tht comment...will try to live up to that standards in future posts as well...keep commenting..

Sandeep Balan said...

@comfortably numb..

exactly...then was so special...now happiness is a ghost of "then" happy times...thanx for the encouragement boss...cheers!

PSYCHO said...

lol
by jove! n i always thought he was a nigger :P

mallu indeed

Dame Folle said...

It's a delight to read something like this post. Nice stuff. I shall keep coming back.
Rgds,
She-Psycho

ranjitha said...

The topic of this blog arose the curiosity to read it, n i loved it..Contents were unpredictable.. Well written..