“Golu, Will you try answering one question for me?”
Sandeep kept looking towards Appu in amazement, visibly surprised at this sudden request.
“Why is it that wounds which are not visible to naked eye hurt the most?"
Sandeep shook his head. He doubted there was anyone who could answer that question with perfect confidence.
But Appu’s voice was ringing with confidence as she continued. “That’s because while a physical wound inflicts damage on your body, these wounds tear open your mind and soul. This pain is excruciating, because the damage is done to your psyche and not your body.”
Sandeep nodded, appreciating her logic. He was the perfect listener. The one who was all ears if the speaker wanted his complete attention. And after all that his best friend Appu had gone through in the past couple of months, he had made it a point to be there besides her as a pillar of strength.
Appu broke into tears the next moment. Sandeep frowned at the sight of her confidence shattering to pieces and tried comforting her. She was weeping inconsolably.
“Golu…Why did it happen with me daa? Everything seemed so picture perfect. It took only a wind to shatter my dreams. These shattered pieces of glass cut deeper into my skin at every passing thought of his. I am losing myself daa. I can never be happy ever again. I am bleeding every moment. Every song reminds me of him. Every place brings back old memories. My wounds will never heal Golu. And I can’t go on like this. I have to learn to mask these wounds. From my parents, my friends and the outside world. I don’t seem to be getting anywhere daa. Please help me with this question that keeps on raising its hood in my mind every now and then. Will my wounds heal first or will I learn to mask them first?” She again broke down after asking that question.
It was Sandeep’s turn now to act confident. He gently stroked her hair and gave her a tight hug.
“Bhondu…..those two questions are seemingly different and difficult, but the answer is interlinked and not that hard. It’s like killing two birds with one stone. It’s finding the right stone that is of utmost importance here.
Take the human body as an example Bhondu. It’s such a complex machine. It’s unbelievable to think that a lump of muscle evolved into atriums, valves, ventricles and arteries resulting in a continuous supply of oxygen to the brain, all in such a way as to make it actually control the parts and enabling the body to spring to life. It’s like turning on the ignition of the car with the heart serving as the engine which pumps the fuel to all the parts. Or take the human eye. As Ryuji in Ring admits that it’s next to impossible to imagine that a piece of skin evolved into a cornea, a pupil, an eyeball, an optical nerve connecting it to the brain, all in such a way as to make it actually see. It’s hard to believe it all happened by chance. There first had to be a will to live, a will to breathe, a will to see, buried somewhere inside living things. Without it, these mechanisms would never have taken shape.
You can even take the example of sea turtles. They dig the earth and lay their eggs therein before heading back to the ocean, leaving the hatchlings completely at nature’s mercy. After hatching, young turtles may take three to seven days to dig their way to the surface. But they do dig their way out. They do it with their sheer will. Hatchlings distinguish light intensities and head for the greater light intensity of the open horizon. After reaching the surf, it dives into a wave and rides the undertow out to sea. They continuously swim for about 24 to 48 hours after entering the water, enabling it to get into the deeper water. A new born pushing its stamina to the limit and fighting odds just to survive. It’s hard to believe it all happened by chance. There had to be a will to fight, a will to survive, a will to challenge.
It’s the “will” that matters Bhondu, a will to heal, a will to spring back to normalcy, a will to forget. If a lump of muscle, a piece of skin and a hatchling can will and attain the impossible; you only need a will to fight your internal demons. It’s an impulse. Where that impulse comes from, I have no idea. It may come from close quarters like your family, your siblings and your friends. It may also come from unexpected quarters like taking up your hobbies, providing an outlet to your creativity and knowing the true you. That’s the precious stone you need to search for Bhondu. You have to find it. I can only help you in the search. But it’s you who have to catch hold of this precious stone called “will” and kill those two faced demons which keep raising their hoods. Which I know for sure my Appu will!!”
*Pic courtesy: Deviant Art